On statistics

The N's justify the means.
-- John W. Tukey

Doubt everything or believe everything: these are two equally convenient strategies. With either we dispense with the need for reflection.
-- Henri Poincare, who might as well have been talking about the choice of alpha and power in hypothesis testing

The rule of staying alive as a forecaster is to give 'em a number or give 'em a date, but never give 'em both at once.
-- Jane Bryant Quinn

In God We Trust. All others must bring data.
-- Anonymous

Lord Mansfield gave the following advice to the newly-appointed governor of a West India island. `There is no difficulty in deciding a case -- only hear both sides patiently, then consider what you think justice requires, and decide accordingly; but never give reasons, for your judgment will probably be right, but your reasons will certainly be wrong.
-- A. H. Engelbach, More Anecdotes of Bench and Bar Cited by H. Jeffreys at the beginning of his chapter on frequentist methods.

Methodology, like sex, is better demonstrated than discussed, though often better anticipated than experienced.
-- Ed Leamer

The goverment [is] very keen on amassing statistics. They collect them, add them, raise them to the nth power, take the cube root and prepare wonderful diagrams. But you must never forget that every one of these figures comes in the first instance from the village watchman, who just puts down what he damn well pleases.
-- Sir Josiah Stamp (1880-1941), British economist

Old actuaries never die, they just get broken down by sex and age.
-- Anonymous

Nothing is easier than to get some sort of figures .... Nothing is harder to get than figures on which we can rely.
-- First Annual Report of the Bureau of Labor Statistics of the State of Connecticut for the Five Months Ending Nov. 30, 1885, p. 3.

A statistician is a person who passes as an expert on the grounds of being able to turn out with prolific fortitude vast quantities of incomprehensible numeric figures calculated with micromatic precision from vague assumptions based on debated results taken from incomplete data carried out through the forms of problematical accuracy by persons of questionable reliability and debatable intelligence for the avowed purpose of annoying and confusing a hopelessly befuddled group of key personnel who never read the damned statistic anyway.
-- Anonymous

Author: Berwin A Turlach
Date Last modified:Wed Jan 3 10:03:20 SGT 2007
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